Wardrobe safari:

Wardrobe safari:

Monday 22 June 2020

Zara coat £15, TK Maxx, pre-loved Laura Ashley top £17,
trousers, 120% Lino, £120, raffia mules Steve Madden £17 (TK Maxx)

Jane and Beryl, along with the rest of the population, have cabin fever... This week, they go 'on safari' in deepest, darkest Hampshire, getting the look from their deepest, darkest wardrobes. 

Dress, local sale, price long since forgotten, hat Patricia Underwood, too much money to contemplate

Beryl tells Jane that animal print is all the thing ('Again?' she says, and tries to stifle a yawn), but she just can't feel the love, and it is missing from this blog as far as Jane is concerned (apart from the odd pair of shoes). This dress has come from her daughter's wardrobe and is the nearest thing: upside-down tigers, probably why it was half price. Whatever, as it gets warm again, it's beautifully cool, and that's all that matters in Jane's world.

Pre-loved Hobbs' jacket, part of suit £20, Belt Hobbs' sale (this season £54) 

 The last few months have led the shallow, clothes-crazed Bezza to reflect that fast fashion and trends are probably a thing of the past. So her new cunning plan is to make good use of what she has, and calmly invest in high quality durable pieces, including the pre-loved. 

To this end she is embracing her inner beast, while making a mental note to buy NO MORE ANIMAL PRINT.  Here she is reinventing her winter season New Look skirt, by adding the nearest thing she has to an actual safari jacket, an aged pre-loved slubby linen Hobbs' number. She has belted this and slung an across body leopard skin small bag, just to prove that aliens have not body snatched her, and that she can still spot an easy style hack when she sees one. 

Jacket and trousers both Zara, previous seasons, blouse, Ralph Lauren via TK Maxx, bag, gift

Beryl is all for the jacket with a belt look (above) and really, Jane has tried this her very hardest. Sadly, this oh so trendy look is not for everyone and she just looks like the proverbial sack of potatoes tied in the middle with twine. This, of course, could be because she is consuming her own body weight in potato crisps on a daily basis at the moment... Leaving that aside, she finds a more casual approach by far the best option (no surprises there from our Jane). 

Now, this must be unstructured enough even for our Jane. Not a belted jacket or pith helmet in sight. Beryl is wearing her winter Apricot tunic as a dress. Sadly, without a waist on view Beryl looks more baby elephant than sleek leopard! Without the strictures of going to the office, Jane and Beryl know that WOACAs have abandoned anything tight in favour of the elasticated waistband, and are busy as they speak pulling the wires from their bras, shouting enough, you bastards!

Linen top £14.99, TKMaxx, trousers, one of Jane's 30 Minute Makes with linen from John Lewis,
Long coat, White House Designer Sale £69, bag, LK Bennett, £25 sale

'She climbed a tree and scraped her knee, her dress has got a tear...' in the words of the Sound of Music, nuns of Salzburg. With two brothers, much of Jane's youth was spent so doing and she feels right at home here. She is trying to rock the Out of Africa vibe and going all out in linen in shades of white and beige (there is a real life tiger just out of shot, honestly).

Mint Velvet sale jumpsuit £45, Dune basket £75, mules charity shop £7

Clothes are not just about how they look, but how they make you feel. Beryl feels like a bit of crumpet, or even a strumpet in this Mint Velvet giraffe printed jumpsuit from last year's sale rack. Ironically, a less giraffe like creature, than Beryl has ever roamed the earth. Just seen are charity shop soft suede mules and a Dune basket bag, which are both proving good investments. 

Get the look...

Necklaces: with feather motifs, 
Materials: linen and cotton,
Hats: straw or panama, 
Colours: earthy, from terracotta, sage, to brick red, tobacco, cream and white,
Footwear: pumps, raffia mules and desert boots. 

Dress, Jackpot, jacket, Fenn Wright & Mason

While Jane has found that she has become a lover of bleach over the last three months, her clothes are crying for mercy as yet another garment is lost on the altar of Too Much Bleach. This dress could so easily have been one of them: as Jane merrily splashes her way through life, a bottle of super strength clasped in her hot, sweaty mitt, its hem got caught in the brunt of her cleanliness campaign. However, ignoring the advice on the wash in dye she purchased which said it would not cover bleach marks, Jane dyed away, et voila! No sign of the offending stains. She highly recommends this approach (but don't forget to run an empty cycle through your machine afterwards).