What We Wear at Fifty

Jane and Beryl are fifty-somethings who somehow did not get the memo to give up and admit fashion defeat at fifty, but rather set about enjoying themselves in improbable outfits which we would like to share with you and indeed on which we seek your opinion.
Jane is 5ft 6in, with a bit of a lollipop figure by which we mean all the action is at the top, while Beryl is a miserable 4ft 11 in, with suspicious thickening around the middle. Jane is a 14 at the top and a 10/12 on her bottom half, and Beryl is a 10/12 on the top and a 10 on the bottom.
Still, undaunted by the setbacks of middle life, we sally forth into the high street, charity shops, and vintage emporia searching for glamorous garments to disguise these facts. We therefore invite you to join us on our quest to work out what to wear at fifty. Please tell us if we’ve got it right, but also have a laugh at our failures.
Much of what we have found to date on the internet has been a sorry catalogue of comfortable elasticated items which are the preserve of ‘Those Who Have Given Up,’ while what there seems very little of is what actual women want to wear.

Ahh me! The comfort of this ensemble! Commonly known as my Nutcracker jacket among my friends, this much-admired Moschino affair came from Foxtrot, a vintage shop which has an outlet in Marlborough, for £45. I’ve put it here with a pair of wide leg trousers from Banana Republic about three years ago which cost around £60, and very elderly but much-loved Fly red patent brogues. This has gone to many an event  from funerals to interviews. The jacket looks good with cream trousers or jeans too, and Cost Per Wear must be £1.

This is a favourite outfit of mine. As I am very short, clean, neat, unfussy lines seem to suit me best. This is a Goat coat bought in a sale for £150 and a Versace dress bought second hand for £80, while the shoes are my beloved LK Bennett snakeskin courts, about £175,  which are surprisingly comfortable and I can wear for hours. The handbag which is Chanel was a gift from an older lady friend, who acquired it, following a love affair in Paris. All the better for its provenance.

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